Tag Archives: teaching

Harry Potter is ruined forever, and here’s why.


Sunday afternoon. Time to chill out, eat chocolate and lounge about in your pyjamas watching films. Except that, along with everything else that teaching has decided I’m not allowed (a social life, a decent amount of sleep, cheap holiday deals…), this weekend it has claimed yet another victim: Harry Potter.

More specifically, Hogwarts’ education provision. Or any film with a school in it. Possibly even any film with learning in it.

The reason is this: every time they showed a scene that took place during a lesson, I couldn’t help but look at it from a teacher’s perspective. Every time Hermione put her hand up to answer a question and was awarded 10 points to Gryffindor, my first thought was ‘Not much AfL going on there’. When poor Neville was strung from a chandelier by Cornish Pixies, all I thought was ‘No differentiation in that lesson’.  And it only got worse – once my brain had seized on this idea, it went wild thinking about all the things that Hogwarts would never get away with if it was a ‘normal’ school.

…And yes, I do realise I need to get out more.

Seriously though – they don’t even teach the core curriculum! No English and Maths?! What kind of school are they running? Ofsted would be straight in there, appointing an Executive Head and placing them in Special Measures; Dumbledore Schmumbledore. Ok, maybe there’s some science, but mostly it’s Chemistry with a bit of plant-related Biology thrown in. And although studying Physics would be slightly moot, as magic can get around most of the laws of Physics fairly easily (Wingardium Leviosa!), I’m sure it would have helped to at least have some idea about levers when trying to break through one of the many doors Harry&co encountered whilst running away from (or towards) various beasties. In fact, when you think about it, it’s remarkable that the Hogwarts students in general seem so highly literate despite never being taught how to read or write. As most of them went to “muggle” primary schools, I’m actually taking this point as a compliment to our state education system, which has clearly set them up for life – or at least to be able to write a 12 inch long essay without ever having learnt how to use a semi-colon.

And then there’s their grading system – all the way from O for ‘Outstanding’, right down to T for ‘Troll’. In a world where teachers are discouraged from using negative language (or even red pen in some schools, due to a fear of its negative and violent subtext) this would probably be dismissed as discouraging and demotivating. Gosh, no – can’t have that! Better change it to T for “Tried your best” or T for “Terrific, except…”

Clearly Hogwarts needs to work on its uniform policy.

Not that it’s all bad. They do have a pretty solid ‘Behaviour for Learning’ system. I mean, it’s all there – the positive reinforcement, the consequences, and most importantly the consistency of approach. I would love to be a teacher at Hogwarts; sure, kids occasionally try to destroy dark wizards without permission, but it’s rare that they answer their teachers back, forget to do their homework, refuse to do any work or throw missiles at each other across the room. Oh for that to be the case in all classrooms. They’ve got it good. Maybe all our schools need is a House System like theirs, with banquets and giant hour glasses and excessive peer pressure, to fix their behaviour management woes.

It actually occurred to me at this point that Hogwarts has many of the problems that may well result from Michael Gove’s current educational reforms – unqualified teachers, harsh end of year exams with no coursework, a focus on facts rather than skills (History of Magic anyone? Yawn.), and a curriculum with little in the way of arts or technology provision. Maybe an overzealous love of Harry Potter is in fact what Mr Gove is basing his reforms on. It would make sense, as it’s probably the closest he’s been to a classroom in about twenty years… But the reality of these reforms is what? The kids hate History of Magic and learn nothing from it, a lot of them buckle under the huge pressure of exams, and Neville gets strung from a chandelier due to the incompetence of an unqualified teacher.

Thinking about Gilderoy Lockhart led me (naturally!) to consider the Hogwarts recruitment strategy. Considering it’s a boarding school, you’d think Hogwarts would have a fairly stringent Child Protection policy in place. And yet, somehow, they end up hiring a guy with Voldemort on the back of his head, a Werewolf, a Death Eater in disguise, and a celebrity with questionable credentials. For a genius, you’d think Dumbledore would be better at reading people. And, what’s more, they get a job without even having set foot in a classroom. Rather different from the day long interview I had to endure to get a job in teaching.

Once you start, there are endless possible comparisons between modern teaching and the parallel universe occupied by Hogwarts (What about poor wizards or witches who can’t pay the fees? Why are there no extra-curricular activities? What about SEN / G&T? What would constitute a Pupil Premium wizard?), however, at this point I’m not sure I’ll have any friends (or sanity) left if I carry on, so I’ll leave the rest to your imagination. After all, it is fiction. I’ll try to remember that next time…



Teaching: The first week


“Those who know, do. Those that understand, teach.” 
― Aristotle

“It would seem that you have no useful skill or talent whatsoever,” he said. “Have you thought of going into teaching?” 
― Terry Pratchett

My first two weeks as a ‘proper’ teacher have pretty much been spent with my mental state bouncing between these two quotes. I’ll teach a lesson that goes really well, and feel on top of the world, love my job. But an hour later I’ll feel like I have no idea what I’m doing, that I’m failing my students and wonder why I ever thought I could succeed as a teacher. 

On reflection, I think (hope) part of this is down to lack of experience, particularly in finding methods that work consistently with the majority of students. This, coupled with the shock of teaching back to back lessons all day every day, means that by the end of the afternoon I am often lacking in the mental capacity to walk and talk at the same time, let alone teach a Year 9 class about classical music. Teaching, I’ve learnt, is all about stamina. As an experienced colleague pointed out to me in the staffroom, “It’s a marathon, not a sprint – have a cup of tea and sit down for five minutes.” This is the adage I’m trying to bear in mind as I end my second week of teaching. There’s no point staying up all night planning super extravagant lessons if you then don’t have the energy to teach the lesson or explain the concept coherently.

On this weary Thursday afternoon as I contemplate an entire weekend of lesson planning, I am leaning more towards the Terry Pratchett end of the scale. I’ve been assured it will get easier. Fingers crossed.



New Primary Education Curriculum: Too much, too young?

I haven’t posted anything about education for a while, but what with the almost daily announcements about reforms coming from government, I thought it was about time I stepped back into the fray.

This article from the BBC, despite its slightly inflammatory title, presents an interesting comparison of Michael Gove’s new primary curriculum with those of Finland and Singapore, which have the most high-achieving education systems of any country.

The comparison can essentially be summed up as follows:

Prof Wrigley said: “The curriculum documents for Finland and Singapore make no demands for eight-year-olds to count in sevens and nines, or for the learning of long lists of spellings which exceed the range of children’s active vocabulary.”

In Singapore children do not begin science before they reach the age of England’s Year 4 children. By this time English children are expected to cover 20 densely-packed pages listing scientific knowledge. In Finland science starts at age seven, and until age 11 is taught within a child-friendly environmental and natural studies curriculum.

So when Michael Gove last week claimed that ‘the changes to the curriculum were necessary to keep pace with the achievement of pupils in other countries.’ and then ‘cited Hong Kong, Massachusetts, Singapore and Finland as “the world’s most successful school systems”‘ I think he was getting his research a bit mixed up. Yes, there may be seven year olds in some countries who can calculate complex fractions, but not in the countries he cites. Their education systems are successful whilst not piling too much academic pressure on very young children, and still encouraging thinking skills and creativity.

In my opinion, Gove’s whole plan to gear the curriculum towards more rote learning and a knowledge based curriculum is skewed. In a world of Google and Wikipedia, what use is rote learning? What we need is to teach our students skills that they can apply in the real world. And this doesn’t come about from our seven year olds trying to learn 20 pages of scientific knowledge.

Don’t even get me started on how this new curriculum will affect those children who aren’t necessarily the most academic.

Teacher Training: Things I wish I’d known…


On a night out with some friends from my PGCE course this week, we got talking about all the things that we’ve experienced this year that were completely unexpected, things that we wish someone had warned us about, and things that we think future trainee teachers should know. So, in the spirit of giving, here is our contribution to PGCE students of the future…

1. You will want to quit at least once. Probably in November, possibly in January and definitely in February. It’s a rite of passage, but don’t worry – if we all made it, you can too! In the immortal words of Dory, “just keep swimming”. We promise it gets easier.

2. You will experience every emotion humanly possible. Even some you didn’t know existed. When X-Factor contestants talk about “their journey” or the “emotional rollercoaster” they’ve been on, they’ve clearly never done teacher training. PGCE should actually stand for “Probably Gonna Cry Every day” …Just make sure you wait until you’re out of the classroom!

3. There’s more paperwork than teaching. And just when you think you’re done with paperwork, they’ll hit you with some more paperwork. Our advice: do it as you go along. Yes, it’s a faff, but it’s preferable to making up an entire years worth of mentor meetings in June when you have deadlines to be worrying about.


4. Many a relationship has failed due to the pressures of a PGCE course. It’s very hard not to become completely self-absorbed during your PGCE year – it’s a survival instinct. And unless you have a very patient and understanding partner, it’s likely they’ll start to get fed up with your inability to talk about anything but teaching and constantly being too tired for sex. Don’t even think about long distance or starting something new, and if by some miracle you do survive the year, be sure to treat them to a holiday somewhere nice to say thank you – I’m sure they will have earned it.

5. You need to make time for things other than teaching. Even when you have more work to do than you can even process, you need to take at least one evening off a week and think about something else. Your work is never done as a teacher – there’s always something extra you could do – and without some semblance of work/life balance you’ll burn out by Christmas.

6. Your coursemates will become like your family. I can say with a fair amount of certainty that I don’t think I’d have made it through this year without them! Whether it’s a day in uni, texting, Facebook or a trip to the pub, they are the people that will understand exactly what you’re going through. They will let you talk about nothing but school, they will empathise with your essay stressing, and they will let you know that you’re not the only one on the verge of a nervous breakdown. Thanks guys!

7. Ready meals will become your best friend. At the end of a 12 hour working day, when you still have three lessons to plan for tomorrow, it’s unlikely you’ll have the time or energy to cook a gourmet meal. Now is not the time to be a food snob – a ready meal is better than no meal. And if you’re lucky enough to be in a school that offers a decent lunch, take full advantage!

8. You’ll learn a lot about yourself. From how much sleep you need to just how patient you really are, it’s a learning curve. Embrace it – knowing about yourself means knowing what works for you as a teacher, and will help you in the long term.

Overall, the main message is: It’s tough, but it’s worth it. You’ll work hard, be more tired than you ever thought possible, and yearn for that day in June when you no longer have to wake up at 6 every day, but when that day finally rolls around, you’ll feel like your arm has been chopped off. It’s a love/hate thing: I’m very thankful I never have to experience this year again, but I’m also super glad I stuck it out. Bring it on, NQT!



This article sums up my own views on Michael Gove almost perfectly, and far more succinctly than I could manage. There are a few points I’d like to add (his derision for the arts, and his completely unsubstantiated views on education which seem to have no basis in real research or evidence, for example), but for those of you looking for more evidence to fuel your arguments against Mr Gove, this article from the Guardian’s Secret Teacher blog is a good’un.

Top ten reasons I love being a music teacher…


So, as this blog appears to gradually be becoming a collection of lists, I thought I might as well go with it and add another one!!

Being a teacher has it’s moments of hair-tearing, blind-raging, hysterics-having awfulness, when you wish you were anywhere else in the world rather than standing in front of 27 kids trying to get them to engage with Mozart. But for all the crowd-control, samba-drumming-induced headaches, and trying not to laugh when a child hits themselves over the head with a cowbell, it’s still a pretty awesome job… So here’s my Top Ten Reasons I Love Teaching Music. Fingers crossed this list will only grow as I start my career as a qualified teacher in September!

1. Kids are hilarious. It may be a cliche, but they really do say the funniest things. This weeks top quotes are: ‘Miss, if you throw enough mud at the wall, it might stick. But my wall is a bit greasy so you’ll need a lot of mud’ (from a low ability Year 10, struggling with learning all the vocab required for GCSE) or marking a test paper about Schoenberg (a famous serialist composer) illustrated with a little drawing of a bowl and spoon, and an arrow labelling it ‘Cerealism’.

2. I get to do what i love all day, every day. Vive La Musique!

3. The HOLIDAYS! It might not be the noblest of reasons, but that moment when you realise there’s only 2 weeks left until your next break is pure magic. It almost makes up for having to work every night of the week.

4. That look of pure triumph on a child’s face when they learn to play that difficult rhythm / tune / chord / harmony they’ve been struggling with for weeks – particularly when you’ve spent a lot of time coaching them and weren’t sure if they were ever going to get it right! If i was allowed to high five my students, that would definitely be the occasion.

5. Walking through the playground at lunchtime and seeing the boys playing football. Someone scores just as the bell rings for afternoon registration and they all jump up and down and run around with their arms in the air, celebrating like they’ve won the world cup – some things will never change.

6. The moment when the kid who’s been playing you up all year, despite you trying and failing to engage him with ever more elaborate and exciting lesson plans, suddenly decides that you’re ‘alright’ and asks if you can teach his class again next year. N’aww. Why did i hate you so much again?!

7. When you get back to the office after your toughest class to find this on your desk (even if your name is spelt wrong…)


8. Having to use my brain / initiative on a daily basis. Having worked in a few other jobs prior to training as a teacher, I can definitely tell you that finding a job where you have to engage your brain at least once an hour is somewhat of a rarity! I love the fact that you may have taught the same lesson 5 times, but each new class you teach it to will still react differently, take an approach that you hadn’t even considered, or require you to find a completely new way to teach a familiar concept.

9. They ask all the questions that you’d never thought of and wish you had. When i first started teaching i wasn’t prepared for the ingenuity of my students. They often spring them on you when you’re least expecting it: “Can women play Gamelan?”, “Why is there no note H?” or “Why isn’t there an E sharp black note?”. All good questions, to which my response is ‘That’s a great question, and I’d love to know the answer myself – why don’t you look it up for homework and tell me the answer next week?’ Works like a charm 😉

10. Inspiring a student to love music, start learning an instrument, to carry on studying music, or listen to something new they never would have experienced otherwise, and seeing them enjoying making music. That’s what it’s all about really, isn’t it?