A friend suggested (yes, i’m aware that it was a thinly disguised insult!) that i should turn this into a blog about all the stupid clumsy things I do on a daily basis. I mean, it can’t be any more mundane than hearing stories about my morning routine, right?
So, to get started, here is my list of Top Ten Most Stupid Clumsy Moments:
NB. theyre not in rank order, just in ‘thought of’ order.
1. Accidentally hit myself over the head with a frying pan whilst drying up.
2. Fell off a bouncy castle and broke my arm.
3. Dropped my phone down the toilet (x2) and in the bath and in a puddle. So far, Blackberry’s are the most resilient.
4. I fell off a bike into a clump of bushes. At about the pace of a snail going backwards.
5. Spilt an entire mug of coffee on the floor of a coffee shop.
6. Stapled my own finger.
7. Fell flat on my arse at a wedding, completely sober.
8. Turned the Chichester Cathedral organ off in the middle of an Evensong service with my knee. Nearly killed the organist in the process of trying to switch it back on, too.
9. Made myself a cup of tea. Knocked it over. Cleaned up. Came back to sit down, knocked it over again. No tea left. FML!!!!!!!
10. Fell into someone’s lap on the tube. Actually, this happens regularly. I’m surprised I haven’t been labelled as a suspected pickpocket / Lady of Loose Morals (that one’s for you, Jazz!) yet. Still waiting to get stuck in the doors though – BRING IT ON!